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Has anyone ever slept with their professor or boss to get ahead? How did it happen? What happened afterwards? (self.AskReddit)
submitted 11 months ago* by tanitup
Wow, this thing exploded. Front page, I'm impressed.
Moral of the story, if you ever reach a hard situation, bang the shit out of it.
[–]imcguyver 263 points264 points265 points 11 months ago
Not me but an a company I used to work at (the startup was 300ish people when it was acquired) had a CEO that hooked up with a woman in sales. He was married with daughters in college and she was married with no kids. They would sneak off during lunch breaks and get a hotel room a few blocks away. I don't recall any favoritism but she rose up the ranks pretty swiftly. How do I know this? The guy running our IT dept let it be known over many beers that he sniffs IM traffic for the purpose of gathering evidence for sexual harassment lawsuits.
[–]IAmTheSixWordUser 57 points58 points59 points 11 months ago
gathering evidence...Sounds legit to me.
[–]firelock_ny 28 points29 points30 points 11 months ago
gathering evidence...Sounds legit to me.
I work IT, and one thing that amazes me is how many people at my company think we read all their emails. We could if we really wanted to, but who has the time or interest to do that?
[–]IveDoneillegalThings 230 points231 points232 points 11 months ago
My high school math teacher was always talking to one of my fellow classmates after class, they were pretty secretive and there was obviously something weird about it.
He switched schools after that schoolyear and married her the following summer.
[–]Deathdiller 137 points138 points139 points 11 months ago
I heard that one guy died after having sex with his teacher. Some say he died of 3 days non-stop high fiving.
[–]Diggity_Dave 411 points412 points413 points 11 months ago
I tried this when I was self employed but all it got me was a handful of trouble.
[–]bigmikeyv 616 points617 points618 points 11 months ago
My boss was hitting on me at my cram school here in Taiwan. she'd push up against me when i was using the photocopier, or she'd grab my groin when we were sitting next to each other. I wanted a raise, so I stayed late one night and asked her what it would take. Before she replied I started massaging her. After it was over I got a 500 (cad) raise and a regular place to bust a nut.
[–]mongrouse 128 points129 points130 points 11 months ago*
Heh, when I first read that I didn't catch the "(cad)." Thought it was $500NT... (about $17US.)
EDIT: $NT = New Taiwan dollar. $1NT = $0.033US / $1US = $20NT
[–]McFeely_Smackup 415 points416 points417 points 11 months ago
I'd bang a chick for $17US.
before someone cues up a Pawn Stars "best I can do is eight bucks", let me say...yes, I'd do it for $8 too.
[–]_Old_Man_Jenkins_ 254 points255 points256 points 11 months ago
How about a half eaten Milky Way and some non-sequential back issues of Ebony magazine?
[–]Repugnance 216 points217 points218 points 11 months ago
what months we talking here
[–]_Old_Man_Jenkins_ 242 points243 points244 points 11 months ago
Every month where the publication date is a prime number, and November 1982.
[–]le-skwrl 323 points324 points325 points 11 months ago*
Not me, but one of my co-workers started going out with the manager, and POOF! next day she became assistant manager.
EDIT- What's going on here? Everyone seems confused.
[–]tyfabes 367 points368 points369 points 11 months ago
Assistant to the manager?
[–]rhayward 374 points375 points376 points 11 months ago
She assisted his manager's manager.
[–][deleted] 277 points278 points279 points 11 months ago
These italics… they're trying to tell us something…
[–]Geppi 99 points100 points101 points 11 months ago
These italics… they're trying to tell us something…
[–]Cheesus00Crust 131 points132 points133 points 11 months ago
[–]theyperch 116 points117 points118 points 11 months ago
Assistant to the Regional Manager?
[–]jbredditor 953 points954 points955 points 11 months ago
I was briefly hooking up with my TA in one of my engineering classes. I got a B- in the class. Here was the conversation with my parents afterwards.
Mom: You got a B- in this class, what happened?
Me: I don't know, it's not an easy class...
Dad: Isn't that the class where you were hooking up with the TA?
Dad: You know jbredditor, that doesn't say a lot for your prowess.
Never gonna live that one down.
[–]ParkerZA 267 points268 points269 points 11 months ago
A B- is bad? In engineering? Jeez, I'm happy with a pass.
[–]jbredditor 337 points338 points339 points 11 months ago
High expectations Jewish mother
[–]ParkerZA 229 points230 points231 points 11 months ago
Indian here. I know that feel bro
[–]jbredditor 327 points328 points329 points 11 months ago
Dude I'm convinced Indians are just Jews who don't eat cow instead of pig.
[–]ParkerZA 227 points228 points229 points 11 months ago
I think you're confusing Hindus with Indians. I fucking love eating cows.
[–]jbredditor 171 points172 points173 points 11 months ago
I'm not the least ignorant person you'll meet.
[–]ParkerZA 16 points17 points18 points 11 months ago
I'm Muslim though, so I don't eat ze pig either. Fuck pigs man...
[–]JOKasten 20 points21 points22 points 11 months ago
The age old fuck it or eat it conundrum.
[–]zjunk 1025 points1026 points1027 points 11 months ago
Unemployed... so, yeah, I guess you could say I'm my own boss.
[–]Happy-Fappy 1181 points1182 points1183 points 11 months ago
[–]249ba36000029bbe9749 23 points24 points25 points 11 months ago
Fapped then got a 10% salary increase the next day.
[–]gride9000 1274 points1275 points1276 points 11 months ago*
Slept with my boss when I worked at ben and jerry's during college. She would give me the shifts i wanted and let me do less work. One time I came by unannounced and fucked her in the office while they were serving ice cream down stairs, right on the company safe. ....and yes, it was the best safe sex ever.
EDIT 2 DETAILS:
1- She was obsessed with Elvis Costello, so every time we got together I had to hear frikkin "pump it up"
2- I was seduced by a woman in her 30s, she took me out for a drink 2 nights after I transfered to her store and I didn't get what she wanted til she invited me to spend the night.
3- The manager of the previous store I worked at and the assistant manager there are now married. They kissed for the first time during a fight about whether to fire me for smoking weed on the job.
[–]wabbajackoff 860 points861 points862 points 11 months ago
I feel like this story has all the classic elements, and they're very well put together.
Must've learned that from collage.
[–]gride9000 328 points329 points330 points 11 months ago
i hate you so much right now, have an upvote
[–]Sir_Beats_Alot 243 points244 points245 points 11 months ago
You weren't an English major at collage were you?
I'll see myself out...
[–]tigbits 197 points198 points199 points 11 months ago
nah... scrap booking
[–]OrbraY 109 points110 points111 points 11 months ago
collage is pretty tough, gotta get all those pictures glued together, ya know?
[–]ratchelle 58 points59 points60 points 11 months ago
Not to get ahead, it just happened while hammered on a business trip.. and then again about a year later. Then I quit and got a much better job :)
[–]the_obs 238 points239 points240 points 11 months ago
[–]rumckle 108 points109 points110 points 11 months ago
I'd just like to thank everyone here, this thread has renewed my desire to get my PhD and become a professor.
[–][deleted] 11 months ago
[–]ellisrgreen 197 points198 points199 points 11 months ago
The best way to talk about dark matter.
[–]Mightyvvhitey 7 points8 points9 points 11 months ago
Flip over baby, I want to examine your dark matter
[–]the_infinite 7 points8 points9 points 11 months ago
You a Wolverine?
U of M is the only college I've seen use the GSI moniker.
[–]nannizzle 9 points10 points11 points 11 months ago
I find this too hot. Reminds me of a guy I dated. We spent all like 5 dates arguing about whether chemistry (him) or physics (me) was the superior/more fun/more useful science.
[–]OurNameIsLegion 301 points302 points303 points 11 months ago
You were that bad, huh?
[–]CJ090 32 points33 points34 points 11 months ago
why? did you fail to get her off
[–]Wesharait 290 points291 points292 points 11 months ago
[–]Thydamine 62 points63 points64 points 11 months ago
Or plot lines to Cinemax movies.
[–]anthony955 1527 points1528 points1529 points 11 months ago*
I'm a boss that slept with a couple of employees. It didn't get them anywhere.
EDIT: Wow. This blew up quicker that I thought.
Okay story time. There's nothing elaborate about how this went down. I worked as a manager for the federal government. I had an office staff of about 40 employees, and a couple just happened to be around my age (I'm 28) and very attractive. The girl I'll call "Clerk A" and I started out just talking at work, which moved to going out to lunch together. Then "Clerk B" gets hired on as a courier/clerk. I get to talking to her too, but we mostly went straight to subtle flirting with no serious personal talk. At this point these women are just friends of mine.
So, the sleeping together part happens when I'm told by headquarters that I need to create a third shift. Normally I am suppose to get a budget boost to hire on a third shift staff, but seeing as we're the government and being the awesome project manager I am, I had to wing it by finding volunteers from first shift. I bring on Clerk A, and two other clerks that night and came in myself (surprisingly not to just be around Clerk A, I just don't believe in making employees do shitty stuff I wouldn't do myself and HQ told my I had to be there). So, we're sitting around on third for a few nights, Clerk A and I get a lot of 1-on-1 time since it's a very slow shift, and finally we sleep together in the most romantic way possible, in the back of my SUV.
Clerk B comes along because one of my office supervisors decided to schedule her on third. I'm still working first, third, and part of second shift because I'm a badass, I had a cot at work (no sex on it) and went home just to shower. Anyways, Clerk A and I end things when I went to an extended lunch with Clerk B (I told everyone to take however long they needed for lunch, often it was 20 minutes, sometimes an hour and a half). This chick treated me like I was cheating on her, even though we were never dating. It doesn't deter me with Clerk B, we continued to talk and her being a courier meant we could see each other in the field. So, Clerk B and I finally sleep together one day (again in the SexUV) after leaving a site. We actually continued sleeping together. Since the job was just a couple of years stint, I eventually had to lay them off (hahaha, shut up). My boss was well-aware of everything I had done, but he's a cool guy that didn't care.
On them not getting anywhere. Well, I had 4 office supervisors. When I needed to hire my last two, my boss actually recommended that I pick Clerk A, as she was a good worker. I chose someone else that I felt was better qualified (a retired Air Force Master Sergeant actually). Clerk B, remained a courier/clerk the whole time, as the boss I could easily see her even if she was in the field for extended periods of time, but she never saw any privileges beyond what I allowed to everyone. Sleeping with them actually made me more paranoid that others would say that I'm playing favorites, my boss already had a reputation of that so I preferred to avoid it. If any of my employees saw favoritism from me, it was my lead office supervisor. I let him call in sick so he could see a Duke game.
[–]bertbargo 161 points162 points163 points 11 months ago
Did I just find a picture of your office?
[–]Alien_Orifice 214 points215 points216 points 11 months ago
My first college class ever was oceanography. The professor began his class by playing that scene in The Eiger Sanction where Clint Eastwood (a professor) rejects the advancements by one of his cute students who wanted to pass the class. My professor's message was clear. Why he needed to be clear was beyond me, for he was almost identical in appearance to the obese spokesperson for diabetes and there was no way anyone would even consider doing something so drastic.
tl;dr Diabeetus guy doesn't wanna have sex with you.
[–]FishLampClock 142 points143 points144 points 11 months ago
When I was about 19 I worked at a long John silvers fast food joint and my manager was an extremely pale red head who smoked cigarettes, after we started knocking boots i got the hours i wanted. Either less or more whatever I wanted she gave me. I also got to do whatever position I wanted. Say for example I was to do drive-thru cashiers I could complain to her and she would swap me to a different position for the day. Was pretty awesome I ended up quitting the job and that was the last I talked to her. Over all, worth it.
[–]TeslaBoyGangsta 301 points302 points303 points 11 months ago
I also got to do whatever position I wanted.
I also got to do whatever position I wanted.
[–]Mightyvvhitey 13 points14 points15 points 11 months ago
Missionary, with express purpose of procreation. No items, fox only. Final destination
[–]mcpumpernickelak 36 points37 points38 points 11 months ago
When I was teaching swim lessons I squeezed my bosses breasts (which were quite large). The only result was that I had a boner bulging in my swimsuit and parents and children to face....
[–]Pyro_With_A_Lighter 11 points12 points13 points 11 months ago
And that is why im going door to door telling you all i'm on the sex offenders register.
[–]rubber_dinghy_rapids 153 points154 points155 points 11 months ago
I slept with one of my clients. In all fairness I am a prostitute.
[–]BamBam-BamBam 564 points565 points566 points 11 months ago
I slept with my professor to get head. My aspirations did not go beyond that.
[–]DracoExpolire 137 points138 points139 points 11 months ago
So you slept with your professor to get a BJ from her? Sounds like two birds in one stone if she's banging!
[–]Verkato 118 points119 points120 points 11 months ago
Sounds like two birds in one stone if she's banging!
Sounds like two birds in one stone if she's banging!
I um... what exactly?... uh
[–]strigen 137 points138 points139 points 11 months ago
Translation: Sounds like you killed two birds with one stone if she's attractive.
[–]ConnorTheCatholic 63 points64 points65 points 11 months ago
I thought banging was sausages?!
[–]raptorshadow 48 points49 points50 points 11 months ago
He was hoping he could give her a hot serving of banger in the mouth.
[–]gaapfan 558 points559 points560 points 11 months ago
Nope. But when I was an intern I slept with the company's best IT guy and then I married him.
[–]Gawdzillers 1008 points1009 points1010 points 11 months ago
ah, the long-con method
[–]Goldface 190 points191 points192 points 11 months ago
This is actually a technique used in espionage; it's called The Honeypot.
[–]macrovore 275 points276 points277 points 11 months ago
Sterling "Dutchess" Archer's favorite spy technique.
[–]electriophile 117 points118 points119 points 11 months ago
Oh my god, you like, sneeze glitter.
[–]xSociety 26 points27 points28 points 11 months ago
[–]deyur 65 points66 points67 points 11 months ago
I like how you word that as if everyone in the company was competing to sleep with the best IT guy.
[–]The_Enchiridion 229 points230 points231 points 11 months ago
Redditor Wife :
Marries IT guy so he lets her look at Reddit at work
[–]saladtossing 152 points153 points154 points 11 months ago
Redditor: Using memes to express things normal people do in regular conversation......
[–]fastredb 9 points10 points11 points 11 months ago
Redditor: Too socially awkward to have regular conversations like normal people do.
[–]Throwthisaway456 195 points196 points197 points 11 months ago
I am a TA and I slept with one of the undergrads i was teaching. It slowly escalated all semester until she told me she wanted my body. We stayed together for a few years.
[–]ClassicThrowaway69 148 points149 points150 points 11 months ago
I know that feel bro. TAing is rough on the penis.
[–]allupgradeswillblost 40 points41 points42 points 11 months ago
she wanted my body
she wanted my body
Funny choice of words. Your girlfriend sounds like she has a future in Bod Spray voice overs.
[–]PriscillaPresley 560 points561 points562 points 11 months ago
Nope, just for the hell of it.
[–]thatsongbysting 315 points316 points317 points 11 months ago
Same here. It just... happened organically.
[–]BDS_UHS 967 points968 points969 points 11 months ago
You know what else came up organically? Me, when I had sex with Eartha Kitt in an airplane bathroom.
[–]moscova89 557 points558 points559 points 11 months ago
[–]Red_Barchetta 406 points407 points408 points 11 months ago
[–]BDS_UHS 356 points357 points358 points 11 months ago
[–]Grass_Is_Purpler 353 points354 points355 points 11 months ago
uhh guys what does a pregnancy test look like?
[–]BDS_UHS 334 points335 points336 points 11 months ago
Like a thin piece of plastic with a thing on the end of it.
[–]Grass_Is_Purpler 429 points430 points431 points 11 months ago
ok so this is definitely a gun.
[–]TheStJimi 239 points240 points241 points 11 months ago
i hope this isnt the main timeline
[–]yaygordo 63 points64 points65 points 11 months ago
My finger hurts from clicking upvotes, call an ambulance.
[–]DivineJustice 45 points46 points47 points 11 months ago
I'm gonna get a drink.
[–]spegeddy 57 points58 points59 points 11 months ago
You don't have to put on the red light?
[–]Grass_Is_Purpler 99 points100 points101 points 11 months ago
you are the opposite of batman
[–]iamesauce 127 points128 points129 points 11 months ago
an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an aN, NAMTAB!
[–]SirVanderhoot 18 points19 points20 points 11 months ago
You don't know what that means!
[–]malenkylizards 34 points35 points36 points 11 months ago
At night, you take off your bat costume and put on a tuxedo, and then go around killing criminal's parents?
[–]Grass_Is_Purpler 57 points58 points59 points 11 months ago
you are a pizza burn on the roof of the world's mouth.
[–]erinadic 93 points94 points95 points 11 months ago
Shut up pierce!
[–]macrovore 81 points82 points83 points 11 months ago
"What, it's where my mind went!"
[–]BDS_UHS 81 points82 points83 points 11 months ago
Your mind went years ago.
[–]Ronnar 20 points21 points22 points 11 months ago
but...she died in 2008....
[–]OmegaArcadia 113 points114 points115 points 11 months ago
Pierce was streets ahead of 2008.
[–]CertainlyHeisenberg 36 points37 points38 points 11 months ago
If you think that was the last year Pierce was streets ahead of, well then you're streets behind
[–]mommy2libras 91 points92 points93 points 11 months ago
Same for me. Work was boring. Getting laid after closing- and getting overtime for it- was just a plus.
[–]trism 229 points230 points231 points 11 months ago
that is literally prostitution
[–]mommy2libras 133 points134 points135 points 11 months ago
I would only consider it that way if I knew ahead of time I was going to be paid for the few hours we spent hanging out and doing the dirty. And if that was the reason I continued to do it.
However, since I literally did become a prostitute about 4 years later, I know tbe difference and it really makes no difference to me what anyone thinks.
[–]trism 50 points51 points52 points 11 months ago
Fair call on the not knowing beforehand. And as for becoming a hooker, and giving not a single fuck what people think, good shit, thumbs up here from me.
[–]whatwasit 38 points39 points40 points 11 months ago
Bet you didn't see that one coming.
[–]AnyRudeJerk 410 points411 points412 points 11 months ago
I came here to get turned on.
[–]Mattenburg 236 points237 points238 points 11 months ago
I came here.
[–]StraY_WolF 148 points149 points150 points 11 months ago
[–]SpoiledPuddin 355 points356 points357 points 11 months ago
Banged my boss's daughter once...that was fun
[–]Gawdzillers 413 points414 points415 points 11 months ago
that was just a movie, ashton
[–]JSLEnterprises 166 points167 points168 points 11 months ago
I am Luke Wilson, and I did the concept first. AMA
[–]son-of-spam 61 points62 points63 points 11 months ago
whatever happened to your nose?
[–]JSLEnterprises 157 points158 points159 points 11 months ago*
you've mistaken me for my blonde annoying brother Owen.
[–]TheTomJhonson 109 points110 points111 points 11 months ago
Well, fuck me sideways. TIL that Luke Wilson and Owen Wilson are brothers.
[–]JSLEnterprises 66 points67 points68 points 11 months ago*
He's the Middle child. I'm the youngest, Andrew is the oldest. Owen is the only one of us that doesnt resemble our father or us for that matter. We like to think he was adopted.
[–]scorchedgirth 52 points53 points54 points 11 months ago
[–]JSLEnterprises 9 points10 points11 points 11 months ago
Its what constitutes great acting... unlike my brother.
[–]beer_bukkake 203 points204 points205 points 11 months ago
No promotion in the world is worth sleeping with my boss.
[–]spegeddy 215 points216 points217 points 11 months ago
[–]Sauburo 625 points626 points627 points 11 months ago
[–]arcainic 95 points96 points97 points 11 months ago
Caretaker to well inherited pet?
[–]ARSE_IN_MY_ANAL 701 points702 points703 points 11 months ago
Actually there is a series about teachers, profressors and bosses sleeping with employees/students. I think it is produced by a company called Brazzers? Not sure entirely.
[–]meathammock 498 points499 points500 points 11 months ago
Worked at starbucks. I ate mocha frapachino out the ass of the shift manager to go home early.
[–]lysergy 799 points800 points801 points 11 months ago
[–]MDA123 305 points306 points307 points 11 months ago
Just like the coffee.
[–]maxjg 192 points193 points194 points 11 months ago
"Just like I like my women; black, bitter, preferably fair trade."
[–]tophermeyer 215 points216 points217 points 11 months ago
...ground up in one pound bags.
[–]mmcg711 54 points55 points56 points 11 months ago
I would kind of like to hear more about this.
[–]TryingToSucceed 77 points78 points79 points 11 months ago
Really? I'd rather not.
[–]MyUncleTaughtMeThat 14 points15 points16 points 11 months ago
Keep lovin dat ass
[–]iamesauce 83 points84 points85 points 11 months ago*
Well, it all started when she decided to major in Theatre...
[–]crwcomposer 78 points79 points80 points 11 months ago
So you got a free Frappucino and you got to go home early?
[–]robbykills 46 points47 points48 points 11 months ago
Are you positive that was mocha frapachino? I feel it would be pretty indistinguishable....
[–]MyPeadyPie 10 points11 points12 points 11 months ago
[–]jsblk3000 135 points136 points137 points 11 months ago
I knew some Hooter's girls who slept with their manager to get scheduled the better shifts and sections. They all had boyfriends and to seal the mental image of some hot Hooter's girls banging their boss he was a short middle aged Filipino dude who was kind of an asshole to everyone, but he knew how to party, spend money, and exploit power. Just reporting the facts, not condoning or condemning. There is such thing as real life porn.
[–]elmarko44 105 points106 points107 points 11 months ago
it hurts to admit this but I had a "my peeps is on the fritz" moment while engaged in a sexual situation with my direct supervisor. I was hoping the encounter would result in a promotion of some sort, or at least some favoritism. But instead, my lack of performance only ended in several awkward encounters and a bit of emasculation. She was cool about it, but I never fully recovered.
[–]iBrazil 227 points228 points229 points 11 months ago
Somewhat Relevant ಠ_ಠ
[–]iliveinapark 31 points32 points33 points 11 months ago
The professor looks like Nigel Thornberry.
[–]The_Turkish_Delite 110 points111 points112 points 11 months ago
Anyone else turn the volume down immediately?
[–]lawlcrackers 13 points14 points15 points 11 months ago
As soon as I read your comment and before it loaded...
[–]sd66 66 points67 points68 points 11 months ago
LOL. "You're passing this class with flying colors!"
"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?"
[–]Fedex7 84 points85 points86 points 11 months ago
Mine wasn't to get ahead, generally gets a few laughs though: So I'm a last semester senior taking Intro to Ice Skating, and a bartender at one of our campus bars. One gorgeous TA, one average. Both come into the bar a lot, I get off work early one night, one tequila two tequila, aaaaand things get heavy with average TA (call her Jen). Jen takes me back to her place (1230am at the latest) and starts blowing my whistle. All is well until her BF calls (she said they were on a break!). Under normal circumstances, I have no problem with answering the phone for a quick 'too drunk/tired, I'll call you tomorrow.' No problem at all. But noooooo, Jen starts balling - waterworks, "I love you so much can we please get back together." At this point I had no idea what to do so I zoidberg crab-shuffled out of her apartment, talked my way out of a public urination ticket, and then had to see her the next day. While not unbearable, a half-blowjob doesn't really make for a smooth next encounter
[–]UnicyclingBear 57 points58 points59 points 11 months ago
Intro to Ice Skating?
[–]Miss_rampage 77 points78 points79 points 11 months ago
I accidentally fucked my boss after a drunken night at a concert. It was kind of awkward for a few days, then we decided we should be together. We've been together a year and a half, and neither works at that job anymore. I was his assistant, so we were closer than most.
[–]awkward_raptor 117 points118 points119 points 11 months ago
accidentally? like, he slipped and fell inside you?
[–]MrCluelessFrog 43 points44 points45 points 11 months ago
And that's why we always watch out for banana peels, right children?
[–]keypuncher 11 points12 points13 points 11 months ago*
Not to me personally, but happened at a small tech company I worked at:
New salesperson gets hired. She is our first female salesperson, and is late 40s, blonde, busty and dressing like she is 20 years younger. Also knows virtually nothing about our product or about tech in general. At the drop of a hat, will bend peoples' ear about how she enjoys booze, sex and golf, not necessarily in that order. Spends a lot of her time hitting on all the male employees (married or not), and gets really nasty if her advances are rebuffed.
She starts having a lot of long closed-door meetings with the company President - a mostly harmless married fellow in his 70s.
Six months later, not having actually sold anything yet, she is promoted to Sales Manager. The meetings with the President continue.
As sales manager, she makes a HUGE sale. ...basically at cost.
A few months after that, the company President announces he is retiring - and that she will be replacing him as President. Half the company has individual meetings with him telling him that she will ruin the company.
He retires, she takes over and runs the company into the ground with assorted bad business decisions (which include buying back all the equipment from her huge sale, a year later).
TL;DR - Busty Blonde Bimbo Boinks Boss, Bankrupts Business.
[–]ahsnappy 14 points15 points16 points 11 months ago
I've always been bad with foreign languages, but was required to take French as part of my major. The professor for my French 101 and 102 was in her early thirties, real cool, not Van Halen video smoking hot, but very pretty. I was struggling in the class, and started going to her office hours for help. Didn't take too long for that to turn into locking the door and railing her on her desk.
Turns out I was a C- French student, but the extra credit got me to an A-. I told my dad and older brother that story a year or two later: high fives all around.
[–]Jessereddit 336 points337 points338 points 11 months ago
I had sex with my teacher so he would give me an A, pity it was an all boys school.
[–]ohmygord 183 points184 points185 points 11 months ago
O, the carefree days of Catholic school.
[–]BradENewman 83 points84 points85 points 11 months ago
[–][deleted] 185 points186 points187 points 11 months ago*
I work two jobs:
1 is for my dad
the other, my brother is my manager
EDIT: I'M A STRAIGHT MAN
[–]ThEgg 315 points316 points317 points 11 months ago
Not with that attitude.
[–]HadrianHammerHand 30 points31 points32 points 11 months ago
Not with any attitude.
[–]musictomyomelette 65 points66 points67 points 11 months ago
They wrestle all the time
[–]NJ_Lyons 25 points26 points27 points 11 months ago
[–][deleted] 34 points35 points36 points 11 months ago
we get along pretty well
[–]waffledave 336 points337 points338 points 11 months ago
Didn't sleep with her, but in high school I would regularly flirt with the Chemistry teacher because I was terrible at/hated Chemistry, and she basically helped me so much during the exam that I would have failed without her help and not been able to graduate.
Years later at the reunion I chatted with her and I think I could have hooked up with her if I really tried and if she was a little more drunk.
[–]ScumbagMatt 517 points518 points519 points 11 months ago
Wow that sounds like a really lame sitcom episode. haha.
[–]jakesalive 305 points306 points307 points 11 months ago
I still fapped.
[–]ScumbagMatt 102 points103 points104 points 11 months ago
its the internet. everytime i open a comment thread theres almost a guarantee that someone is in that same thread with their pants down.
[–]daj0 88 points89 points90 points 11 months ago
i believe these people dont wear pants to save time
[–]sam219 48 points49 points50 points 11 months ago
don't act like you're above us
[–]righteous_scout 44 points45 points46 points 11 months ago
nobody faps to /r/fearme.
[–][deleted] 112 points113 points114 points 11 months ago
The comments on that subreddit are super unfriendly. I was all like "Hey guys whats up, this is cool" and they were like "We wait in darkness for when silence dies" and I was like "Oh, well, yeah."
[–]Leo-D 14 points15 points16 points 11 months ago
Oh man I wish I was stoned when I read this.
[–]spegeddy 44 points45 points46 points 11 months ago
[–]spegeddy 66 points67 points68 points 11 months ago
Reporting Back: I came, twice, still refuse to put on pants.
[–]Indian_Troll 51 points52 points53 points 11 months ago
You came twice in a minute? Gentlemen, let's get this man an award.
[–]Mr_Bimbles 10 points11 points12 points 11 months ago
Edit 30 seconds later: you win.
[–]captain_obvious_scum 398 points399 points400 points 11 months ago
I fucked my one of my college TAs. Why? Cuz I could and it felt good. Finished on her tits.
[–]Tulki 224 points225 points226 points 11 months ago
[–]LieutenantCuppycake 176 points177 points178 points 11 months ago
Would receive load again.
[–]cdr_popinfrsh 27 points28 points29 points 11 months ago
My fiancée was a TA. She fucked one of the students in her class. She's no longer my fiancée...
[–][deleted] 59 points60 points61 points 11 months ago
Sometimes we just gotta live vicariously through interent strangers.
[–]Shitty_Hoedown 287 points288 points289 points 11 months ago
My grades in college were really starting to suck,
I needed something better than hope or luck,
I decided to seduce my professor,
Too bad she rejected me and I failed that semester!
[–]elmarko44 366 points367 points368 points 11 months ago
'Tis a clever rhyme, young lass
but sadly, you didn't pass
you did not get laid
nor make the grade
because you wouldn't take it in the ass
[–]jewbaby 59 points60 points61 points 11 months ago
[–]assesasinassassin 7 points8 points9 points 11 months ago
Read this in the voice of Colin Mochrie. Worth it.
[–]9ninety_nine9 126 points127 points128 points 11 months ago
I sleep with the Director of the company I work at at least 3 times a week. In fact I just did an hour ago.
This has been going on for 16 years. It has definitely had a lot of positive benefits both financially and personally.
We have been married for 10 years this December.
[–]EugeneHarlot 49 points50 points51 points 11 months ago
You've been married for 10 years and have sex 3 times a week? GO YOU!
[–]McFeely_Smackup 33 points34 points35 points 11 months ago
Back when I was in the Army, there was a chick in my office who got away with doing LITERALLY zero work. She was always camped out in our team chiefs office just yukking it up with him...we just assumed they were banging.
One night when I had oncall duty, I got a page at like 2:00am from a number I didnt' recognize, so I called it back...no answer. called again...no answer. So I went back to bed.
Next day I mentioned in our morning meeting that I'd gotten a "no response" page, and this chick piped up "oh that was US (looking at the team chief), we just wanted to see if you'd actually pick up a call in the middle of the night".
The chief gave her a look that told EVERYTHING we ever wanted to know.
Funny thing is a couple years later there was an Inspector General investigation about this same two, now stationed at a different base, about fraternization and favoritism. So you know I spilled the beans.
nothing personal, but she wasn't hot enough for as big a bitch as she was.
[–]Yogurt_Huevos 8 points9 points10 points 11 months ago
Worked at a Pizza Hut, never again in the freezer, it was way too slippery. I didn't gain much from that exchange.
[–]kennybob 39 points40 points41 points 11 months ago
I slept with my boss's wife...they were split up at the time, but having him chase me through the house and down the alley with a bat, just like in the movies, was all worth it.
[–]frowayacct 103 points104 points105 points 11 months ago
Slept with my boss. Not something I planned out, but he came after me, so I figured I'd go along with it to try and get a raise or something out of it. He wasn't attractive what so ever to me, and his personality was even worse. I got promoted within a week, with a small raise. That's not to say I didn't work my ass off still, though, because I did.
Started noticing funny things going on with employee hours. Figured out that he was embezzling money from the company and the employees, including myself. Also that he was fucking 2 other girls there as well.
[–]10tothe24th 214 points215 points216 points 11 months ago
Who would have thought that someone who would give an employee a raise in exchange for sex would have such loose morals?
[–][deleted] 26 points27 points28 points 11 months ago
This is all of my fantasies combined.
[–]watershot 36 points37 points38 points 11 months ago
Whole lot of "never happened"s
[–][deleted] 1110 points1111 points1112 points 11 months ago
I had pretty hot sex with my highschool english teacher throughout highschool.
She would pull me out of classes, make me stay after school etc. just so we could fuck. Dam she was hot, couldn't believe that nerdy, teenage me had scored a 10/10.
Started one day when i she asked to see me after school and whispered "i want you to fuck me" into my ear, and sure enough i obliged.
This sounds strange because this never happened.
[–]submareddit 150 points151 points152 points 11 months ago
What am I supposed to do with this erection now?
[–]allupgradeswillblost 461 points462 points463 points 11 months ago
I use to hate you, but now we're cool.
[–]mtlt 8 points9 points10 points 11 months ago
What are you using that makes you hate him so much?
[–]abelcc 243 points244 points245 points 11 months ago
This sounds strange because this never happened.
Why you did this to us, WHY
[–]boopthat 7 points8 points9 points 11 months ago
This one is not me personally, but a girl I know from highschool. I graduated a year ago. This girl was an incredibly attractive girl. She had an unbelievable rack and had dat ass. She had been flirting with the math teacher/tennis coach all year, and he had also been reciprocating. We never understood why girls liked him so much. He looked like Lord Farquaad. Anyways, they didn't actually sleep together until the summer after graduation, but the teacher still got fired when they got caught. They got caught because the girl showed emails between the teacher and herself to a friend of hers, and the friend sent those emails to the schoolboard. The reason he was able to get fired was because the new roster had not been completed yet, so she was still a student until then. The whole fiasco ended with him divorcing his wife. He had 2 kids (one autistic) and another on the way. The teacher was then hired by a local college and was my math teacher first semester.
[–]myalternateaccount_ 36 points37 points38 points 11 months ago
I had a student who was insanely hot and we flirted for months before starting to meet for coffee. Then we progressed to facebook chats that gradually became loaded with more and more innuendo. We're both in relationships so we kept it at flirty chats. Until we both happened to be in Paris - alone - on the same weekend. It was the kind of coincidence you just don't pass up on. A weekend of crazy sex, that we both agreed could only be that one weekend. Now we act like it didn't happen although we are still great friends and, when I see her in class, I can't help but imagine everything we did. Didn't change how I graded her work though.
tl:dr - Had sex with my student. It was awesome. I didn't raise her grade.
[–][deleted] 1223 points1224 points1225 points 11 months ago*
Yeah, I thought I could help my career by making her squeal. But it sucks because it was going on at the same time as my son's birthday, and then the next day when my ex-wife asked why I couldn't make it I had to tell to tell her the truth because my son's birthday wish was for me to tell the truth for 24 hours.
[–][deleted] 336 points337 points338 points 11 months ago
THE PEN IS REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOYYYALL BLUUUEEEEEE
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