Do you really feel that vanity and sex are actually bad motivation?

the_hamburgler · 11 months

[deleted]

Mogwoggle · 11 months

Whatever works for you.
Wanting to feel attractive/confident is just as much a reason as wanting to be strong.

KingE · 11 months

Whatever you can think of that gets you in the gym day after day, month after month, is good motivation. Just don't be like most people and stop immediately after marriage.

e_d_sea · 11 months

I started wanting to look good in a bikini.

4 years later... I keep doing it because it makes me feel great: I have energy, I sleep well and can do more with my day than when I was out of shape. Also I look 10 years younger than everyone my age, and that's just awesome. So yeah, vanity is still a big motivation for continuing to work out but for different reasons than when I started.

ShawnGupta · 11 months

hahahaha, getting laid is the only reason why I work out.

C1D3 · 11 months

Working out is actually helping you down every path you go down in life. There are too many positive points in life to get too detailed, stemming from working out. The main thing is if you work out and eat healthy, you are setting yourself up with the mindset that any challenge----paper is due, bills need paid, relationship problems, negativity coming from employment outlooks----is something that can be overcome. You work out just to get laid, your missing a few points. It's great that you are doing it.........just dig down for more motivation.

jandersnatch · 11 months

I workout to crush my enemies, to see them driven before me, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

chronicvape · 11 months

But, if you are doing it, to get chicks, you are still doing it for yourself?

Or am i confused?

I do it for both vanity and strength.. Nothing like being able to move around with ease and pickup/move things without getting hurt.

Philll · 11 months

If everyone in the world disappeared tomorrow, I would still work out.

makubesu · 11 months

I'm pretty sure most men wouldn't even get out of bed if it wasn't for the ladies.

That being said, I'm going to offer you two words of caution:

There's more to life than sex.
Just because you're stunningly attractive, doesn't mean you should prioritize physical appearance in others. You'll be happier dating a girl who you have great chemistry with, than an agreable girl with a nice body.

gambatteeee · 11 months

If vanity and sex are wrong, I don't want to be right.

catfightonahotdog · 11 months

Getting laid? I'm married. I lift because my wife buys lots of furniture I have to move.

WezzyP · 11 months

50% vanity, 50% sanity.

2goodforyou · 11 months

No Pecs, No Sex.

khamul · 11 months

Do whatever you want to do as long as you don't hurt anybody, it's your life. If you're fit to look good to girls, you're still fit. Just don't become a psychopath.

whoisearth · 11 months

Everyone should have a healthy level of narcissism in them. I would argue that a lot of the people who bulk/cut to extremes have unhealthy levels of narcissism in them but that's more of a discussion for /r/psychology .

There's an extremely fine line between a healthy and unhealthy body image. The problem is that because one doesn't necessarily look bad when they work out excessively it means we overlook if they may have mental health issues similar to a bulimic.

Anyways, I went off on a tangent.

No, vanity and sex are not bad motivation.

Bitchesl0veusernames · 11 months

[deleted]

sound_puppy · 11 months

My workouts involve running and biking mostly. I don't care what girls think, it's fun as shit going fast. I need the adrenaline rush, and if I can't get it through exercise, I'll either drive fast on the highway, or pickup smoking.

_archer_ · 11 months

well, it could be construed as bad, as once you get yourself in a long term relationship you might lose your motivation to keep fit.

otherwise i'd say it's fine!

chronicvape · 11 months

i'm going to be honest here, i have gone from very slim to slightly fit as a dude, i see absolutely no difference in how girls treat me. be fit because it's a healthy lifestyle.

humanlimbspool · 11 months

Women don't care about appearance as much as men. When you look better, you will feel more confident, and you will be more successful with women because of your increased confidence. So if you do get in better shape without changing your attitude it won't help much.

BeastModeYouBeezy · 11 months

I started working out so that I'd look better naked and therefore get laid more often.

cirocinmycup · 11 months

I do it primarily to be more competitive in sports. Getting girls and looking good are the added perks ;)

antonfire · 11 months

One difference is that if you're doing it for looks and sex, you will probably stop caring as you get older; if you're doing it to be strong and healthy, you will probably care even more as you get older.

It's not exactly easy to change your motivations for doing something, though.

Marshall40 · 11 months

you scored a surprising amount of karma off of this, but hey man! I'm in the same boat as you

rocketshipotter · 11 months

Girl here, and to be honest my main motivation is to wear the clothes and style I'd like to wear. And guys are kind of a motivation too....

Toppguy · 11 months

Nah bro, there is really all kinds of ways to motivate yourself and one is not better than the other.

Some of my best accomplishments have been because I was trying to impress girls. Now that i'm [slightly] older I have realized I can motivate myself in the form of my own selfish desire, rather than my desire to impress girls.

TL;DR Pick your poison/ Bitches ain't shit

sre01 · 11 months

I think whatever you use as your motivation is fine. My reasons are part performance, and part vanity. Don't worry about what others think of your motivations.

fireline12 · 11 months

I started out just trying to gain weight to get more girls. Now, I feel dirty if I have to skip a workout for any reason. And that's just 6 weeks in to working out seriously. I think it starts out with vanity, and to an extent that continues, but you'll probably feel bad if you stop working out.

thejosiekiller · 11 months

It is almost undoubtedly the worst it has ever been for me in terms of relationship prospects at the moment (literally zero), and I am easily in the best shape of my life.

...so no, I don't do it for the girls. If I was relying on that for motivation I would have given up a long time ago.

pseudousername · 11 months

The three reasons why I work out: 1) I feel great. More energy, better posture, better sleep and I feel more 'centered'. 2) For appearance. 3) Respect. In a world full of bullies and mean people, it's nice to look big and strong so that people instinctively treat you with more respect.

pandatrooper · 11 months

Ok i used to be a pretty fit guy and than a year into college because a pretty big guy and now i am working out more so i trying to trim down. honestly the biggest reason i am working out is to be a size i want because i would obviously want my wife/gf to be happy with me as i would be with her (looks wise). it might sound petty and stupid but honestly you are MORE likely to get laid being in better shape and i can attest to that. yes i do get laid as a bigger man but not as much as when i was in shape. in the end as i said i am doing it not just for me but so the person who i spend the possibly the rest of my life with will be satisfied physically with me as i am with them. Hopefully that makes sense. in no way am i saying you cannot be happy big and i dont want anyone to take that away from this.

[deleted] · 11 months

The only reasons I do is because I love checking my self out, sports and my girlfriend has a deal with me where I work out and she does yoga and runs. Makes everything so much better.

stfuendie · 11 months

do money next! that one can make up for vanity and sex, since it buys both.

[deleted] · 11 months

Vanity and sex aren't bad reasons for working out. It is just considered mentally shallow, which usually (but not always) means many people will quit working out quickly because there are not 'strong' enough reasons to keep pushing them to work out.

Also, sex and looking good enough to get sex (through working out), isn't 100% guaranteed. So when you don't see those returns on your investment, there is not much motivation to keep going.

However, getting healthier, stronger and faster are guaranteed when you workout and if you do it for those reasons which is what most people mean by 'doing it for yourself', then you always will see returns which you have paid for in hard work, which motivates most to keep going.

Kagrenasty · 11 months

This is why I believe people should keep in shape doing a sport. This way you are getting in shape for a concrete purpose and not to appease your vanity.

Iworkonspace · 11 months

Wanting to look good and look good naked are perfectly viable reasons to get in shape. It's been one of the motivators for me -- I think it all depends on how determined the individual is.

It is a very personal battle -- do it for yourself, do it to pick up chicks, do it for your mother...whatever the reason, just keep making that trip to the gym, and keep working hard and the rest will just fall into place.

yooossshhii · 11 months

I do it for myself. So, when I'm jacking off I can look down on some nice abs.

bnguyen1114 · 11 months

As a guy who has seen the chubby, lazy, and druggie side of life, working out is as much as outlet for confidence as it is a way to maintain discipline and motivation. That trickles into other aspects of your life and who knows? Maybe your work or school could see improved results.

Oberhaselpuselbart · 11 months

I do it to feel good. Having sex, looking good and being strong makes me feel good.

brandonwarrant · 11 months

My only goal is to look good naked. Glad that I am not the only one!

shupack · 11 months

"what is the purpose of language? To woo women!" - dead poets society....

Looking good purely to attract women seems natural/logical to me, and it is "for you". It's to attract women to YOU. it's to get YOU some action. If you were fat and ok with it, you probably still wouldn't be ok with not having women attracted to you, so it works for you, go with it.

2nd q, would you rather have a car that looks fast, or is fast? The prowler looks awesome, but drives like crap, it was a flop. The 911 IS fast, and is one of the most successful model lines ever. Go for strength, the physique will naturally follow. I'm reading Starting Strength right now, amazing book. $10 on kindle.

dale0607 · 11 months

I work out in the gym because it relieves stress and gives me an overall sense of well-being.

It's a plus that I turn girls heads when I'm in public.

Andralynn · 11 months

I wasn't worried about my health. 90% of my family is over weight and nobody suffered from high blood pressure or diabetes. The one thing motivating me is how I won't have to shop in specialty stores looking forplus sizes. That and wearing yoga pants and tiny sundresses ;P Ymmv though :-)

JasonPKaplan · 11 months

Well, I actually am lifting with the motivation of strength, wanting to deadlift more and squat more and bench more and press more and all that... but the initial impetus for that was vanity and wanting to look good, and the motivation behind getting stronger is so that 60% of my 1RM is way higher than what it initially was, so that when I do train for hypertrophy/vanity I'm doing it more effectively.

[deleted] · 11 months

The people doing it for vanity are going to be very disappointed to hear about something called age.

FoxTwo- · 11 months

Here's my experience with this subject:

When I first started lifting (about a year and a half ago) I did it solely with the intention of getting a six pack. I started by bulking 40 pounds over the winter.(I was already overweight when I started.) When summer time was on the horizon, I went into a massive cut for the purpose of getting a 6-pack. I ended up cutting a bit more than 30 pounds and got the 6-pack around July(I'm now realizing how much muscle I lost during that period, too. Welp.)

By this point, you'd think chicks were dropping the panties at my mere presence. Yes, I did get more looks than I normally would, but I was -- for the lack of a better term -- an SAP. In a nutshell, I started working out because I was depressed, thinking that getting a 6-pack would help me climb out of it. I just ended up being a depressed fucker with beautiful abs!

I've since ascended from that state and now work out simply to see what my limits are and break them. I no longer workout with an ideal image of myself in my head, because I've realized that that's not a very concrete way of measuring my progress. Instead, I just push myself to outdo my prior performance, the enhanced aesthetics are simply a byproduct.

tldr: Workout to push yourself and the aesthetics will come; also, women like when men stay committed to actions and you saying that you work out to better yourself sounds better than you you indicating you simply workout to look good for them.

im_too_literal · 11 months

Chick here (in case I end up expressing a feminine viewpoint I didn't know was such).

Vanity and sex aren't bad motivators because they still motivate you, but they're fickle. There are things that are going to erode your sex appeal no matter what you do; time is the big one, but there's also the fact that not every girl you like will like you back. When your sex appeal suffers from things you can't help, are you still going to keep exercising?

TheLateThagSimmons · 11 months

Vanity and sex would be bad motivation for me. Most of the girls in my life mention quite often how the body is nice, but never required. Then again, once you hit 30, if you hold out for a great body you'll rarely ever get laid.

Also, being that I play a lot of sports, I love playing against guys who just have "the gym bod" because they're rarely tuned for athletic purposes. Even though I'm significantly smaller than those guys, I can very regularly out-perform them in almost every category on a rugby pitch, football field, soccer pitch, basketball court...

Further motivation for me is being able to rub it in their face after I burn them, "Why don't you go do some more arm curls and get back to me?"

Hearing those kind of guys say "How are you so strong?" is probably the best back-handed compliment I could hear. They tend to stack me up as a skinny guy but don't know that I can easily squat more than they can, I can push more than they can, and I can tackle much bigger guys than myself as a result.

I definitely work out for fitness purposes rather than aesthetics. A better looking body does come along with the package so it's not like it's never going to help in that regard. I do like the compliments I get from women (and men), but I would still workout just as much and as hard even if it were deemed unattractive to be athletic.

I just want to perform better in every aspect of life.

shanedoth · 11 months

Whatever works for you.

Personally, this isn't a good motivator for me because this motivator doesn't fail gracefully. That is, do I stop working out just because I'm already getting regular monogamous sex in a committed relationship, and any improvement I make isn't going to really affect that? I expect that after I get married and have kids and stuff I'll still be very serious about fitness. Second, as I get older I find that appearance alone isn't well correlated with attractiveness - letting attractiveness be my motivator for fitness means that I am likely to simply maintain a baseline level of minimal fitness and devote my attention towards other ways of being attractive. Seriously, if I'm out to get laid, spending an hour at the dog park is probably better bang for buck than spending an hour at the gym.

So I think one needs to think through why they work out. It's perfectly acceptable, and probably even desirable, to have multiple reasons. I just know that "attractiveness to potential sex partners" isn't enough in itself to get me to work out.

WTFICantFapToThis · 11 months

Health is my only motivation.

[deleted] · 11 months

I don't know about you, but my motivation went like this:

Month 1: "I'm not really attractive. I want to be stacked like that guy. I think I'll learn how to lift weights."

Month 2: "Wow, this is harder than I thought. I think about giving up sometimes, but this feeling afterward is amazing! I really see why people do this so much."

Month 5: "Look how far I've come! I've lost weight, gained muscle definition, and I feel better than I ever have! I'm hooked."

Year 1: "I've built a base level of fitness, I bet I can raise my squat and dead in a few months to 315! That would be really impressive!"

Year 2: "My body is amazing, and I impress the hell out of myself... but look at people like Jack Lalanne, Arnie, and DeFranco! I have so much more to do... my journey has just begun."

Year 3: "Everyone who knew me before sees me as a new man, I am reborn. Everyone who I have met along my journey can't imagine me as overweight and weak. This path I have chosen has redefined my outlook on life, and I no longer fear change. I am change; and I'll change anything I don't like. I am my own master."

Melodramatic, sure. But I am my motivation.

MrLister · 11 months

That headline makes me think of This Guy

(Look at this post... oh my god, it even has a watermark.)

LifeStartsNow · 11 months

Life is all about reproduction. Everything we do, we do to gain a mate. Working out is no different. I'd say it's fine motivation.

gungfuguru · 11 months

I've found that (with the same motivation) when I'm in a steady relationship, my fitness declined. Eventually, I just wanted to be awesome all the time. I do it for my ego, and I make my workouts challenging enough to keep that ego in check. I've also had some great heroes to inspire me.

Phunk131 · 11 months

Endorphins are also fucking awesome.

zebbielm12 · 11 months

No, why the fuck would I put forth this much effort if I didn't want to get laid?

Willravel · 11 months

Do you really feel that vanity and sex are actually bad motivation?

No, but the healthiest motivation is probably persevering over adversity and gaining healthy self-confidence as a result. Sex and vanity, while awesome, might work better as tertiary concerns, because a person's primary value is not as a piece of meat or as a sexual partner. They're parts of a whole. A sexy whole.

What's more important to you, physique or strength? Do you care more about how you look in the mirror or more about hitting that 300-lb squat etc?

Between the two, functional strength. From where I'm sitting right now, I can be on the roof in less than 10 seconds. I certainly can't complain about the physique, though.

Note: this is all simply imho.

kakashi_ · 11 months

Vanity, definitely my favorite sin, "tlk"

jimcrator · 11 months

Ask them what they mean when they say it's bad motivation. Do they mean it's ineffective? Unethical? Something else entirely?

As to answer your second question, I do it because I want to be more athletic. Personally, I don't at all like the muscular aesthetic (and neither does my girlfriend), so I guess it would be more appropriate to say that I work out despite vanity, not because of it.

positivelyecstatic · 11 months

Whatever gets you working out and eating right is effective motivation. I think people say this because being fit alone isn't going to get you laid. The confidence helps but you aren't going to have girls fawning all over you all of the sudden.

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